Embodied Movement

Dancing on the Beach

Embodied Movement…   In the light of love – we move.

How could I best describe embodied, conscious movement? And why has it become an indispensable part of my life style?

Have you ever noticed how children move, hop and dance around? Ever so effortlessly, it looks so natural. They seem to be having so much fun. That’s exactly why I love embodied conscious movement – it’s utterly liberating and helps me unwind from all the dealings that are part & parcel of the grown-up world.

It’s a medicine to my soul I have access to – at all times. Through moving my body together with all other moving bodies in a safe container facilitated by a skillful and present guide by our side.  I become more aware of what transpires as I move together and on my own.  Pivoting from exploring, tasting your dance to coming back home to my own dance – enriched by the experience of a new flavour I can now add to my own.

I am wondering – is there such a thing as “my dance”? For, I am a composition – a formation of all the people and experiences I have ever been touched by in my life. However I may have perceived it – pleasantly, in fear, with aversion, with an open or a closed heart and mind.

I cultivate a deeper sense of awareness, anchoring my faculty of presence as I begin to move. In a most playful possible way.

I share my experiences with my fellow movers; feeling comfortable to be myself – my authentic me. I am not expected to please or have a need to dance to impress upon anyone. And when I do, that’s fine to – as long as I am aware of my beings and doings. I dance to express all different parts of my self – sometimes fast or slow, vigorously or through a set of micro-movements, with music or in silence, in communion with people, the ocean, trees, the sun, the birds, all that is around or simply on my own.

I am allowing myself to be, through movement – there is no agenda. Only pure movement – I have no need for any substances that would alter my state of being.  When I move I can’t get stuck. I don’t wait for the emotions or my moods to change before I decide to make a move – I instigate the move and let the emotions follow the suite. I nudge myself to move despite the flavour of my current state of being.   As I begin to move, I create the flow with it’s ripple effects and let it take me where I need to go and do my thing. When I move I don’t get stuck. My movement can be tinny – invisible to the observing eye – yet, inside me, I move. My gaze softens, and I allow my body tissues and my nerves to relax. I realize there is no need for competition, exaggerated ambition, or intensity when not called for.

Our bodies hold the innate intelligence that informs us of our deeply rooted patterns that keep us out of balance and no longer serve us. When I pause and tune in, I am able to learn how to move, to move through such patterns that cause me unease.

I learn to cultivate moments composed of many pauses – moments where I simply freeze. Being a witness to myself, to others and being witnessed by others – not trying to change anything, to interfere, or interject. Being present for my fellow movers while allowing whatever is wanting to occur – to happen.

Tears, joy, fear, trepidation, doubt, memories, pain, desires, pleasure, love, hate, connection, disconnect, projections, anger, shame, blame, judgements, wanting to hide and run away, feeling helpless, not knowing. All parts of ourselves are welcome on the sacred dance floor; nothing is taken personally, yet all is personal.  

Nothing is taken personally, yet everything is very personal.  

And so I take all this learning and embodied wisdom as I transition from one container to another. From my scrumptiously delicious dancing pod in sunny California to my beloved home in the cold, green north. To my workplace of play, inspiration, and creation.

There’s no separation when embodied, conscious movement leads the way. Sometimes I choose to move slow or fast, gently or vigorously, in a big audacious or tinny, small way. Always trying to be aware of my semipermeable moving vehicle with the capacity to embody it all. To choose and say yes or no. To participate or take a break. To set healthy boundaries. To watch life unfold – for me, for us all.
 
With gratitude that I am alive – that I have the required means, time, support, courage, and will to experience the gift of a year-long with Zuza and you all.  

I show up. Trusting that I can. I come to this world to play and be the being of love, which I am. When I mess up, that’s ok. I pause, reset and start again. I know that I can. Because I am. A being of light & love. Showing you the way, just like you show me your way to live my life more fully, as an expression of my most beautiful, generous, loving, joyful, authentic self.  Oh, I do love that thought.

So, it is true.
“From caring comes courage”,
the courage to listen and respond
to the calling of the Heart.
(The Girl With a Rose)

I thank you for enriching my life with your preciousness, with your divine presence. 

I dance… I am danced…I become my dance. The dance becomes me.  

And now, I wonder… How do you move through your life? What is the one thing I have shared that could enrich your dance of life, making it more pleasant, fulfilling, meaningful, revealing? Five percent more or five percent less can can make a big difference.

Is it possible for you to receive this flow of thoughts with an open heart and place it at the back of your mind as you go about your day – and see what transpires when you least expect it?

Yeah, I am a curious mover, that’s for sure.  

Zuza, thank you for delicious 5% 😊💕. In the light of love, we move… “

Nine Billion of Us

Nine billion of us, drumming the same beat – together.
I chiseled out the following few verses for you, for me, for us all.

Let’s get this vibe right.
Gently close your eyes, breathe in and out.

Only this time, breathe through your heart.

If you feel the sudden twitch, it’s alright.
Take a deep sigh of relief – that’s a good start.

And so it begins…
My story is but one of billions of stories unfolding
in this moment of time. 
There are many common themes we share.
This one is about love and acceptance. 
It’s how it all begins,
with the sweet loving fragrance called life. 

Yet, I’m always seeking something more,
wondering: What am I here for? 
What have I got to give that can be lovingly received?
How can I best serve in this life?

Am I not enough the way I am?
The question – at times it feels intense.
Is it possible to feel too much?
So much, it sometimes drives me nuts…

We all come with a safety switch,
just like the fuse box comes with the home.
When the surge gets too strong,
the room will yield to the absence of light.

When it’s nighttime, it gets dark inside out.

I know that too well; I also switch off,
going from one extreme to nothing at all in my own magnetic field. 
Thank God for the impeccable heartbeat;
it knows how to drum on its own.

I closed the doors on countless dreams,
and shattered futures, or so it seems,  
out of worry, out of fear.
Worry and fear, a deadly weight,
can stop the flow, and seal our fate.

I need to let go of my compulsion to control,
being hesitant with the unfamiliar, the unknown.
The lasting imprints of past events
can make us fight or run away.

In the moment when I’m about to fade,
the lighting strikes…
I get an insight.

I recall that there’s a different, lighter way to take.
I can breathe through my heart,
and vibrate in a different way.
It’s not how I was programmed to respond,
it’s what I was truly meant to be.
If you know what I mean…
There’s a way to be.
I know it well; it’s always been there.

Light is right
and often, less is more.

I’ve always been grateful for guidance and words of wisdom,
but I no longer seek gurus to define my way. 
because I am ‘the way’.
The wisdom of ages is inherent in us all.
Through billions of us, it flows, when we open up
and trust the synchronous flow.

As I remember and hum these sacred words
every hour of my day, 
both fight and flight begin to fade away.
A kind, loving, receptive heart is what sets me free.

I thank you for hearing me out,
for receiving me,
with your open heart.
By being received, I’m able to give,
to feel and to heal.

I am not just an inept kid I was once thought to believe.
Each child holds treasures, precious and rare,
a heart that’s gentle, selfless, and fair,
a spirit that’s caring, kind, and true,
a gift to share, with me and with you.

There are 9 billion of us, drumming the same beat,
with 9 billion beautiful hearts, each moment, together,
humming the sacred tune.

A symphony of notes is more enchanting than their parts.
The union of souls, more powerful than each solitary heart.

And no matter how far on the highway I reach,
I’m always the same distance away from the ditch. 


Karma – the Law of Cause and Effect

Cause and effect…

Whatever I think, say, or do causes a ripple effect – it travels onwards. Often times I have no ideas where it ends, if at all. Just imagine how it’s all happening in a perpetual motion – continuously unfolding events based on how we project our thoughts on an individual level and how +9 billion people add up to the flow on a collective level. Can you imagine that?

It works like fractals with endless number of variations and permutations. Mind boggling just trying to imagine.

It’s easy to see actions and how one action leads to another – I smile, you smile back. Or words – I say thanks you, you reply: ‘you’re welcome’.

But what about thoughts? It’s more challenging to see the tireless working of the mind – yet, it’s the busiest area and represents the key to how your fractals dance and how your life unfolds. Tell me how and what you think and I’ll be able to determine the probability of events in your immediate life. But is that all?

What if this is just one of many lives our soul comes wondering through. Surely than there’s a law of cause and effect, so called karma, that spans across more than one lifetime.

The yogic scriptures say karma is universal. They say no-body can ever escape the law of karma, that life unfolds according to our deeds.

Yet sometimes it appears as if that’s not true – seeing some people living a carless, selfish, destructive, damaging life style full of poor habits and they’re still powerful, influential, wealthy, healthy, and look happy.

Could it be that at some point over their lifetimes they have earned a lot of merits? Their account has a great balance and no matter what they do they continue living based on their past life good deeds? If that’s true, I shouldn’t be fooled, because what comes around goes around and the balance keeps on changing. At some point they will probably reach zero sum balance and when that happens, life situation changes – usually suddenly and drastically.

It seems like karmic balance operates according to the most accurate banking principles. None of our balances diminishe or appreciates out of some budgetary interventions, deflation, or inflation. No one can take anything away from you, or meddle with your balance – what you earned is yours to own.

Can we do something to change our karmic balance? I think so. Karmic balance changes all the time. There might be limitations in terms of how much effort and how long it will take to get rid of certain burdens, but we clearly have a free will either to react or to work it out – as long as we’re aware. Between every stimulus and response there is a space of freedom that is always ours to claim – noticing that is awareness.

For example, you’re struggling in your life, you’re stuck and not able to live a reasonably comfortable life fit for 21st century.

The first step is to recognize the area of struggle. This might be related to your poor health condition, you may be experiencing financial struggles, you’re not having the most pleasant family life, difficulties with your job, you attract people that are not nice to you. Basically, you feel stuck in one area or another.

What’s the second step?

The second step is to acknowledge your dissatisfactions – things that cause irritation. For example, you have an issue with your shoulder and it’s painful. You may struggle with money and it’s causing your worries. You may have a shitty relationship with your manager and find it challenging being in their presence.   

Step number three is to accept it – fully, in your mind and heart. I accept the pain that causes irritation, I accept my financial situation and my worries, I accept that it’s challenging for me to be around my manager.

Fourth step is to shower your love, all your blessings and attention into areas where you experience such imbalance. Sending and feeling love and kindness are your two most powerful allies that will eat up your karmic debt if you persistently and consistently repeat it. Along with gratitude for having been given this chance. How fast? It all depends on how much balance you have on your account and how uninterrupted is your flow.

Yes, there is step five. It’s called action. You may have to do something about it – change your job, undergo an operation, you may have to show your acceptance through some actions and change your behavior. But that alone is not enough to fix the issue that got you where you are in the first place – there has to be recognition, acceptance, genuine letting go, infused with gratitude, and lots of love and kindness.

Sometimes it may be your task to clear up generations old karma – it’s not an easy task, you may often find asking yourself, why me? Why not my brother or sister? Why me? It could well be because you are capable for completing such task.

Human beings – on a physical level we all look similar, however, on a soul level we may be completely different. Soul journeys can span across tens, hundreds or thousands of lifetimes. Rarely will the individual in this life time remember the journey of their soul through those lifetimes. Yet, you may feel as if you are an old soul – you are even able to recognize one, wondering: ‘are you sure we have not met before?’ This has happened quite often to me.

There may even be familiarities you notice, as if you have done certain things in life already, even if you haven’t. The learning of a particular craft comes very easy to you – feels like second nature. You can effortlessly understand math, you are naturally talented in arts, music, languages, etc. You can sit in-front of the potter’s wheel for the very first time and spin up a perfect mug in a first go.

Not everything is a coincidence in life. Certain people you meet were supposed to cross your path. Some stay for a short time, some linger longer, a few stay for a life time.

There may be times when you don’t understand why life has put you together with ‘certain’ people you find extremely difficult to be around. Well, as long as there is any outstanding balance on your accounts you will continue experiencing a particular lesson that always finds a way to trigger your reaction – until it doesn’t. At some point you will be free to choose how to respond – only you will know when you reach that moment. At that moment you will realize that between every stimulus and your response, there is a space of freedom that is always yours to claim. You became more aware.

Parents, siblings, relatives, partners, their family, friends, colleagues, rivals, competitors, students, teachers, children – we are all gathered here to learn, to grow, to become free.

In my own space and silent time, I had often wondered why have I been such a restless soul – moving countries, continents, homes, jobs, leaving behind my family, many beautiful people and friends I have met along the way.

Let’s just say I had plenty of outstanding balances from the past – my soul would not let me rest until I settled my bills. I learned that meditation helps, but that’s not enough. I had to go through various experiences in life to learn my lessons, to pay my debts – either to individuals, whole generations, or countries – serving until I was free to choose, to move on. It often felt like a burden, I did not understand why. Sometimes it felt like being locked in a prison, even though it did not appear so from the outside.  

Either I was not fully aware, not unwilling to accept, or not yet allowed to understand. I don’t know, but I know I wasn’t free until I settled my bills. Looking retrospectively, I can assure you – there is no free lunch in life.

Some way or another you have already paid for it or you still will. So, choose wisely, when you can.

There’s one tricky part in this whole equation and a note I must add. When particular karma is over and you’re free to choose – your old habits, behaviors, and belief systems you have built out of your ‘karmic limitations’ may still be there and very much alive. Make note of that – there will be some work required to clear that up, so you can properly be free to choose how you wish to respond and live your life going forward, else you will end up creating more karma.

For example, it was my karma to be born into a particular family constellation I was born to. I was able to free myself from its grip at some point in life. After that came a more challenging task and that’s been all on me – I have to free myself from all the conditioning I have developed during that time in that particular environment and leave the past burdens behind. If I don’t, if I choose to continue behaving in the same old conditioned way – out of fear, resentment, lack of trust, anger, etc. I will be increasing my karmic account balance and I will be forced into the repetitive cycle once again – no choice. That’s how history repeats itself – it’s a genius creation of a perpetual cause and effect flow with a never-ending story.

Recent events in my life have revealed much truth to me – how acceptance, gratitude, love and kindness lead to more freedom. Everything that happens in life is an opportunity for us to break free from some sort of clutches that have most likely been self-inflicted at some point of our soul’s journey.

I rarely see my life from this perspective, but what are the odds of a girl born and bred under the Alps, infused with Slavic, Italian, Austrian, and Balkan culture, to end up living in the north east of American continent with her best buddy from the southern part of India. Both from completely different locations, family backgrounds, unalike in appearance, personality, traits, habits, culture, yet very similar in ways impossible to explain.

Why did life bring such two different worlds together that would otherwise have never met? Out of where did such combination occur? What are the probabilities, can anyone explain?

Yet, so much learning has happened in the past 12 years and particularly over the recent 3 months – I wouldn’t even know where to begin. Let’s just say I was finally able to accept my Indian family, the culture I once opposed and rejected. I feel very grateful for the opportunity I was given in this lifetime. It feels deeply liberating when the burden of constant irritation is gone, when ego stops complaining, fighting, resenting, judging, not accepting, feeling insecure, not trusting, and when I am finally able to see all the beauty and blessings life has stored for me.

This too is called karma – stuff – so much stuff. Some stuff feels burdensome, some is full of Ananda – bliss, joy.

And here I am. Reflecting, pondering, following my thread of thoughts, putting it down with my favorite silver pen, with a conducive golden nib, and the most beautiful blue green ink with golden glitters.

Thank you life, for all the precious gifts I am able to receive.

Om

Background: This piece of writing started off by me experiencing an overwhelming sense of anxiety in the early morning hours. It was the calling of my thoughts, the invitation to let them go, to let out this story that was throbbing under my skin, causing me to feel how I felt. It all feels good after I spill out the ink. It works for me.

Life is Your Oyster

Sundial

Your life is your oyster,
so live fully
and love wholeheartedly.
Respect all life forms,
even the pesky army of ants invading your sink,
including the blood-thirsty bugs that prick

through your precious skin. 
 
Trust life – there are no mistakes.
Be grateful for all you have and don’t have now or quite yet.
Share your blessings.
Learn to generously give and graciously receive,

whatever it may be.

Swim through your life gracefully;
There’s no need to resist the flow.
Give yourself in, so you can glide effortlessly.
I know that you can,

I know that you will!

Be kind to yourself, to others.
Strive to do the best you can.

Work it out before you act it out. 
Work it thoroughly out.
Don’t let the old habits you no longer need act you out.
You have the power to alter and script your old story.
Where there’s wisdom, courage and will, there’s always a way.

Work ardently, patiently, and persistently!
You are bound to succeed

and cut down the number of Groundhog Days. 

Find your own pace, your sacred space,

and your inner peace.
Know thyself so you can trust yourself.

At all times, recognize what tingles your heart,
what kindles your flame,
what gives you joy, the spark in your eyes.

Use your time well,
and may your life be an incredible journey
to always be proud of, to behold!
Make sure you never feel remorse.

Before my eve comes to an end,
I say thank you,
I bid you farewell,
I send you my love with a smile,
with hope for another glorious day. May it be blessed. 

What About Regrets?

Meandering river surrounded by mountains

How often do you catch yourself regretting something you should have done, but you didn’t? Or something you shouldn’t have done but you did it anyways?

You revealed your secret or you didn’t.
You accepted the new offer or you didn’t.
You moved to the new place or you didn’t.
You dissolved a romantic attachment or you didn’t.
You ventured to new destinations you’ve always dreamt of
or you didn’t… not yet.
You opened your heart or you kept it closed.
You allowed the kiss to unfold or you sealed your lips and bowed out.
You devoured the juicy orange or you waited too long
and the sun-ripened fruit was gone.
You said I’m sorry or you didn’t… not yet.

You are exactly where you want to be, who you want to be, how you want to be. And if you think you’re not (not yet), because you generated too many regrets, you are still exactly where you want to be. Also, you can still get exactly where you want to go, with more ease if you are willing to drop your regrets that hold you back.

You think, there for you are. I am, therefore you are. Being right here, right now, because when you are – fully here and now – there is no space for regrets.

Learn to strengthen your faculty of presence – become fully engrossed in the present moment.

Feel the wind breeze on your skin – fully.
Smell the freshly baked bread or some other aroma you may like, that brings up a sense of happiness.
Watch the birds flying, the squirrels jumping, branches of the tree swaying in the wind.
Touch your arm, massage your neck, kiss your own hand!

Bring your attention to something that anchors your senses here and now, so your thoughts may follow, so you can bring your mind home, here & now – yes, this is home!

Or simply – read these few lines totally engrossed – the lines I have put together with my fullest attention, for you, my dear fellow traveler, wholeheartedly.

Life is like a meandering river, full of life, ever changing. Never can you step in the same river twice. Never are you the same person again. And so is your life journey – continuously morphing. You can never repeat the same moment again, hence, try to live it fully, whatever that fully may be for you. Don’t compare your life with someone else or with your past self – don’t get lost in comparing, judging, regretting. Accept your life and every single moment that brought you here & now. Be grateful for everything that happened or didn’t happen in your life.

Why? Because in this very moment of time you are the sum of all the moments that have brought you to this point in life. A culmination of all the bits that have made you the way you are.

I would not be here & now if one single twinkle was left out. It doesn’t matter how I perceived that moment in the past – but it matters now, because although that moment cannot be changed, my current perception of that moment can.

And there is nothing else more powerful than the realization that everything is perfect, just the way it is.

Health, sickness, wealth, poverty, happiness, sadness, regrets, pain, suffering, acceptance. Yes, even your regrets are part of who you are in this very moment. Even regrets are perfect as soon as you are able to perfectly accept them and accept yourself for having them. And if you struggle doing so, ask yourself a question: ‘Do they serve me well? Are they life enriching companions? Do they bring me peace, joy, a smile to my face? Or do they make me cry and cringe? Being soaked in my own regrets what happens to me? Does it take away my ability to be more present, from living my life fully here & now? Do I need really them? Is it time to let go?’

What is your emotional state right now? How does it feel having to experience these feelings? Look into yourself, be honest with yourself – no judgement. Take a deep breath, hold your breath for a few moments, allow your thoughts and emotions to sink together, then… breathe it all out. With a sigh or two if needed be. Do this motion a few times, as many times as you think & feel you need to, and then, take a few moments to be fully present with yourself. Nobody else but your own self.

There’s not much else left, really. Acceptance, knowing you are here & now, whoever, wherever you are, whatever you have or not. Simplicity. Feel & recognize yourself fully, be grateful for being alive, as you enter the flow and you ride with the force of your own, powerful, life-giving breath. Simply, by being, remaining aware, for as long as you can. Move your fingers, your toes, your nose, your legs, shoulders, smack your lips, blink with your eyes – just because you can.

What an empowering thought. ‘I can!‘ So simple, taken for granted – yet – when I realize that no stone, tree, or building has that same ability & gift as I have, it makes me smile, I feel empowered and grateful to be what, where, how, and who I am.

As human beings we are blessed to dwell in perfect human bodies, we have brilliant minds, capacity to move, think, feel, sense, love, spill our hearts out. I can scratch myself when I feel an itch – and I am the only one in this whole wide world who knows that I have an itch, only I know where and how to scratch myself to sooth my itch. Hence, I know what freedom is, even if it has to start by noticing an innocent itch that never goes unnoticed and unattended. At leas for me.

You know that very well, we all have that in common, that’s why it made you chuckle & smile. Say ‘thank you life’, next time you get the pleasure to scratch yourself again! 

Fundamentally, life is good. Rivers flow, just like your precious, god/force/nature given life. Human beings – what a miracle and force of nature, such an incredible potential, so many possibilities at any given time in life.

One final conscious breath, lungs filled up with fresh air, a short pause, and out I go following my exhale. In with the new, out with the old! It’s the only way forward weather you think it or not. I am, therefore you are. I did what I could, and I didn’t what I couldn’t.

I try and do my best in whatever I do. Even if I have to say I’m sorry, I really didn’t know better, but now I do. I learn from mistakes, I let go, and I move on. Just like the flowing river. It’s the only way forward, not by being an obstacle to myself and to my continuously inherent flow.

Allow life to flow, remain as present as you can so you can respond accordingly at any given moment in time, do your best, and use your time wisely & fully & well.

Life is precious. It’s a good life. So, let it flow!

Om