The End

Woman, watching the horizon

Ever story that has a beginning has an end. It’s inevitable, no matter what.

Beginning and the end – they meet at the same point. Sounds crazy? That’s because it is.

Nothing really happens, apart from the stories happening in my mind. It doesn’t feel that way though. We get so invested in stories that we weave – physically, emotionally, mentally – that it feels real. It has to be, for the sake and for the existence of the illusion.

The more invested we are in the story, the more real it feels, the more real it is. The more infused, the more attached we are to the illusion.

Here’s an opportunity to check where you stand.
What are the areas that get you hooked the most?

Those are your weak spots that keep you away from going free, from being totally free.

It can be attachments, aversions, obsessions, beliefs, habits – anything from work, school, success, health, food, sex, family, children, music, art, relationships, money, fame, sports, spirituality, lifestyle, etc.

What is your drive? Where does your attention flow? Towards entanglement or dissolution? That is the key, because any of those areas above can either be a way out or a way deeper into the matrix.

All the areas are benign on its own. Innocent. It’s us who apply meaning to each area; we are the story writers. The weavers of our reality.

Is the story I have just written offering you a way out or is it locking you further in? It’s that simple.

Use this simple checkmark, every step of the way, with every activity you engage in, to help you understand if you are on your way in or out.

I like this thought, it offers hope – well, at least to me.

I can still have passion for things in life, but my attitude becomes different, my focus is no longer about getting all wrapped in. It’s about taking each opportunity as a lesson, to live and let live. To taste, to experience and to move on (i.e., to be). No stories, no attachments, no aversions. Just like breathing air – breathing in, breathing out, in and out.

The sun simply shines, it never gets involved in any stories. Our minds do. Love is – light as a feather – yet we tend to make it all heavy, complicated. River flows and somehow we like to mess it all up, butt in, interfere with the flow, muddle the waters.

The flowers bloom, the birds sing, the honey tastes sweet. They all are & do what they are meant to be & do. Just like you & me could – and still can. You get the picture?

Life is is an abundant representation of pure energy flow and look what all we’ve managed to achieve.

We reduced it to daily problems, lies, manipulations, dramas, struggles, events of joy or sadness and we marinate there with our presence, fully engrossed – sucked in. We easily forget what life is all about.

Our stories become more relevant than what is – we become most important, so that the illusion can live on. The illusion wins.

The beginning becomes the end.

Try – sometimes – try to let go. See where it takes you… the pure flow.

Om

“All that is gold does not glitter; 
not all those who wander are lost;
the old that is strong does not wither;
deep roots are not reached by the frost..”
― J.R.R. Tolkien

The Power of Your Inner Resolution

Campfire with 3 friends and a child

I’d like to dive into the following set of ubiquitous questions that are pertinent to so many of us.

How do we come out of drama? Why does my mood get influenced by other people’s actions or reactions? Why do I get sad, angry, irritated? I try to stay composed, but when I see someone else close to me being grumpy it disturbs my peace… what to do in that moment?

The power of resolution is within you. What do I mean?

It’s the QUESTion that drives the resolution. It’s the question that defines your stance, current situation, and your future. The question is your guide.

To start with – instead of asking a question “How do WE” – the emphasis should always be on ME! How do I…? The power of resolution is concentrated inside yourself. The correct use of language is important. When I start disidentifying myself with we, I take away a great portion of my own strength.

Imagine you saying to yourself, and there’s only you, nobody else – now WE will eat this piece of scrumptious pie that is laid in front of US on the plate. We will drink the juice from this glass. WE cannot – only YOU can.
I can eat the blueberry pie, as slow or as fast as I wish, with my fingers, with a fork, or a spoon. I can even have it with ice-cream, as an appetizer, main dish or a desert. Breakfast, lunch or midnight snack. I can finish it off by licking the tips of my fingers if I wish so. The emphasis is on the experience of “I”. 

It’s that simple.

A more precise question formation would be: How do I come out of drama. Now that’s a more accurate guide. Once you ask yourself that question, close your eyes and start tapping into your deeper layers of your mind.

What do I mean by drama? What does drama represent to me?

The answer is very personal to each of us, nobody else can provide that answer to you. We each have different backgrounds, level of tolerance, perception, awareness – each of us is bound to perceive life events and drama in a different way. What irritates me? If I remove that irritation from my life, what does that feel like? Where is this irritation coming from?

For example, my irritation gets triggered by me noticing someone smacking their lips when they eat, I start rolling my eyes, as soon as I hear that smacking sound.  I say to myself: ‘It’s been so many years and it still gets to me? What is this craziness, obsession of me even noticing that sound? Why can’t I simply let go?’

The point here is not about me trying to change someone because their action irritates me, but by figuring out what is it with me that causes that reaction? Why can’t I get over it. So much so, that I begin being irritated by myself not being able to get over it. The drama takes the twist, becoming even more “drama rama”.  

As I tangle myself in irritation, I lose my focus, my presence of what really matters. I become consumed by trivial matters in life and that is the price that I pay, being overshadowed by the mighty drama.

When I get irritated by something, it indicates my own inner resistance to what is occurring here and now. My resistance to get over the obstacle that prevents me to be fully present, to breath freely, to laugh, to love, to enjoy the moment.

Instead, all the beauty is gone – delicious blueberry or apple pie I am eating – I can’t even taste it to the fullest anymore. I forget about the precious comfort of my home, the joy of sharing, the sheer fact of what it took to make such a delicious piece of pie I have the privilege to enjoy eating. I totally forget about the gratitude that I am actually being able to enjoy this experience. Gone is the full experience presented to me by life, right here, right now.

All that abundance is being consumed by irritation, by resistance to move beyond. And it outcome of my choice – it’s a simple human choice. I can reset my mind with a breath or two, remind myself of what truly matters to me in that very moment and just be with that. Moment to moment. Being perfectly content.

Also, I often forget and underestimate the power of projection. Do you have any ideas how powerful your thoughts are? So much so they have the potency to add to the struggles of others by strengthening their shackles, with the power of your mighty thoughts, hence prolonging their current status quo. Close relationships can be incredibly powerful opportunities to help us transform and us helping the other to transform by noticing such nuances. When in a relationship we all carry the responsibility to ourselves and the other not to perpetuate the endless circle of samsara – suffering.

We all manifest our own realities – moment to moment we continue feeding and reinforcing our life situation by actively painting the seeds of next growth.

We all know the saying: ‘the more you resist, the more it persists.’ The intensity of my resistance defines where I am in life – the more I resist, the more challenging are my life experiences. Things get harder. The stronger I am as a personality, the more intense is the experience – for me and everyone around me. Until it snaps, it breaks, people fight, they split, life becomes a mess, leading to one big drama.

When you see someone being grumpy and jumpy and that starts to irritate you, you internally start forming a thought pattern about that person – a picture that paints them. If that’s a very close person, you share a bond, a connection.

Even when you don’t say a word, every projected, silent, intangibly thought has an impact. Do not underestimate the power of your thought; your thoughts can be as real as your actions. They have the power to influence people around us and their behaviour.

Thanks to your contribution, the grumpiness and jumpiness of the other can become a notch stronger and the possibility of the other person to come out of their misery just a bit harder.

If this resonates, and if it feeds into your reality – it could be that a part of you enjoys seeing other people being grumpy and jumpy. Be mindful to notice your deepest intentions; inquire into your actions. Notice if someone else is doing that to you, be the one stops this endless wheel of unnecessary suffering.   

Having all these insights, what does that make you feel like?

It makes me feel responsible for every thought that I give space to arise and grow in my mind. Not just my words or my action, which are the tip of the iceberg. The real stuff is hidden beneath.

When I became so obsessed by being irritated by the action of others, I lose touch with myself. Gone is my awareness – I’m totally into someone else. It also indicates how much I resist the change and how stuck I am in my own little ways. 

I have to ask myself another questions. Do I really want that kind of reality for myself? What am I like? Does my resistance to change help my general wellbeing? Is there a different way? I have a choice. Oh, the glorious freedom of choice that was given to us all, human beings.

Free will – but only when I become aware. How much, how often, and how long do I remain aware before I slip and snap again? I know I will slip & snap – until you no longer will. It’s like any other skill – the more we practice, the more skilled we become. It applies to every single action – baking cookies, painting, playing music, gardening, cleaning, designing, engineering, programming, or being aware.

My dear one, I truly wish you all the best in your life, because you deserve a beautiful life. It’s time to start imagining that and slowly bringing it into existence. My dear, only you have the power to do so. Don’t allow to get consumed and sucked into thinking “others” are the cause of your irritation. They are simply there to mirror your own perfect imperfections. They are actually doing you a favor, by helping you to recognize those imperfection, so you can work on it, let go, and get over. Life is much bigger and so much more magnificent than the narrow focus that might have temporarily consumed our attention. You have the tools, use them well and good luck, much love to you! Sharing is caring, there’s no shame in facing challenges in life. We’ve all been there, this way or another.

When you genuinely recognize and share your struggles, you invite the help that is needed to heal those struggles. You become open to receiving the many gifts this universe has to offer. So many gifts hanging out there, like ripe fruit, waiting to find their place. Isn’t that a nice thought?

Always remember, the power to resolving any issues is within you, always within your reach. Other people can show you the way, nudge you to walk towards a certain direction – but they cannot walk instead of you. Stay brave, you already are – you have made the first step by recognizing and asking the QUESTion. Stay persistent, keep up with it – one step at a time. Keep on walking and stay present. May the answers you derive at guide you towards you inner resolution. I wish you good luck!  

Memories, Entanglement, and Free Flow

We cultivate memory as a means of continuance (Krishnamurti).

Krishnamurti goes on to say that without memories our property, ideas, friends, family would not matter as such.

By strengthening your memory muscle, you cultivate your ‘me’ and ‘mine’.

The gap between the two thoughts represents freedom from thought, freedom from ‘me’ and ‘mine’. Timeless space without any memories is important to cultivate, unless we want to become entangled in the events of life and afford ourselves no freedom.

Krishnamurti’s perspective on memory resonates. So, having assimilated his throughs, where do I stand? Where do I go from here?

What is the level, the intensity of attachments I have towards my stuff, my possessions, my home? My partner? My ideals, idea of achieving a life scenario I so intensely imagine?

By all means, one needs a certain level of thought intensity to live, and to achieve important goals in life that enable us to live our lives in comfort we desire & require. With least resistance and mind interference as possible. While doing least harm.

Once I have fulfilled my goal – either way I perceive it, as a failure or success – how willing and ready am I to let go, to drop it? How nimble am you, how quickly can I move on?

Dropping it and moving on, puts me back into the flow – I become that moment again. The potency of my level of success lies in between the two thoughts. How do I cultivate that to achieve my state of no thought – the state between the two thoughts? The silence between two notes when playing a piano.

In order to become freer, one has no choice but to first deal with any unresolved issues from the past. The things that lock your freedom and your potential is the memory of your past you hang on to and actively keep on bringing to the present, clogging up your current flow. Consciously and subconsciously. Do whatever you need to, to let go. Find the right help, or therapy, make sure you forgive, resolve, pay your dues, have that conversation or encounter you’ve been avoiding for many years, let go of the grudge, resentments, anger, and attachments. Let go, for your own good.

If you can, in your life, try to choose the unknown as often as possible. Start with little things, something you find comfortable. For example, some new food or flavor, a new kind of pen, different ink, the uncharted path in the forest, talk to the kind stranger in the shop. Challenge your comfort zone. Anything that counter balances the strength of your existing reality and dominance of your current thought patterns that add to your status quo.

All those small, conscious steps you make along the way contribute towards your greater freedom as you start widening and deepening the gap between the two thoughts. Slowly, slowly, you begin understanding what it means to become a creator of your own life, choosing your own fate, instead of living the assumed one.

Widen your gap, choose well, and may your life, and the life of those around you be blessed.

Om

(Above is the image of the painting by my dear friend and an inspiring artist Edward C. Campbell – The Umbrella Man, link to his playground: The Old Mill)